I want to start off by saying I understand trauma I was SA’d by my father from as early as I can remember until I was 12. I was 16 when I told my mom what happened, there was a trial I had to testify at, and ultimately my father got 8 life sentences. I received SO MUCH free therapy from the state. I didn’t take it seriously. I had an attitude that everyone in the world owes me something because of what I went through and I hated the world. I didn’t work, I became severely addicted to drugs, and was kicked out of my mothers house becoming homeless. After 5 years, I snapped out of it, went to therapy and accepted what happened to me. I now have a great job, can pay all my bills, but most importantly I can help those who have gone through the same or similar situations. One time someone told me “What happened to you is awful but if you can take that and help other people you will over come it.” That’s exactly what I did.

Tophia’s childhood was definitely filled with trauma. Papachu and his mental illness, being bullied, and she also says she was SA’d when she was 10. I believe this is where her entitlement comes from. She had a shitty love from the start and believes she needs to be compensated for it. I used to be the same way. It does not help that Marie had always treated her as a child and has agreed with her not working etc. Her most recent video tells me all I need to know: she will use this trauma as a crutch for as long as she can. Instead of blaming the asshole tgat carjacked them it’s the internets fault. We all know this is untrue. She also says no one helped her and no one cared until Donald died. This is also far from the truth. People have given her resources, told her to get a job, told her to get off the internet, and told her to stay at a shelter but she refused. I remember one specific live where she said resources wouldn’t help and that she needs money. She continues to go on the internet and share everything but gets upset when people comment on her life. You can’t tell people to “leave you alone” when your constantly putting everything on the internet. She refuses to ever look at herself like “maybe we should have went to a shelter, maybe I should have gotten a job”. Would these things have stopped this tragedy from occurring? That’s something we will never know. I’m not blaming her for what happened because it’s not her fault. However her lack of guilt, lack of self awareness, and the way she is somehow able to blame strangers on the internet that had nothing to do with her living situation or Donald’s unfortunate passing is truly astounding.

In conclusion this trauma will be her reason to continue to do what she does. I’m sure she will be offered free therapy from the state because she is a victim. I’m also sure she will not take it. As someone who refused to take therapy seriously, and use my trauma as a crutch it is no one else’s responsibility to help you overcome trauma and fix your mental health. You cannot complain about trauma and mental health while actively doing nothing to fix it (I know this tragedy just happened to her 3 days ago but I know a year down the line she will have done nothing to help herself). In my case I used drugs to numb my pain, I believe tophia does this with the internet. Tophia you cannot sit in self pity. The truth is no one owes you anything. No one is required to help you. A lot of people have shitty things happen, but it is their responsibility to over come it and keep pushing forward in life. As someone who had a victim complex, I can now say I no longer look at myself as a victim. Instead I see myself as a survivor. In my opinion this is the only way to overcome trauma. Unfortunately I don’t think tophia will ever do this, but I would love to see her prove me wrong.